Whatever You Have Held Back, Let Him Have It All

by Robin Buquoi on 09/02/10

We sing, “I surrender all” but we live “I surrender all that I can for now”. Problem is… some days I can’t surrender much. I am holding onto so much of my “stuff”—my hurts, my disappointments, my lost dreams, my expectations, my anger, my hang-ups.

There are situations in all of our lives that we want to believe that God will change, but deep down we don’t really believe it will ever be different. That is a mental battle. I can tell someone else that God is big enough to move mountains, but the mountains in my own mind seem somehow larger than life and unwilling to budge. I’ve tried after all…

Utter abandonment, without any reserve, seems to me too much to be asked for. I am afraid that I will lose control if I let go (as if I really had a handle on it in the first place). It is too great a risk.

We deceive ourselves into thinking that God will continue to bless what we are doing to “fix” the situation, to contain our emotions, or to make things change. God never said, “you take control and I will bless it.” God said, “obey and give me control and then you will be blessed.”

In both the Old Testament and the New Testament, God used terminology that was understood by the people of their day…often related to farming or fishing or building. I can take those same lessons and apply them to my life today. I am planting and watering and waiting for a harvest in my life. I am casting my nets and bringing in the catch. I am building a foundation, a frame, and a place of protection. All of these lessons are for me too.

In Deuteronomy 11:13-28 God doesn’t ask me to control my life, He asks me to give it all to Him…and to trust Him with the results. But there is also a warning.

Click here to read Deuteronomy 11:13-28

Often I need to know that the rains will not overtake me but will water a dry and barren area of my life. Often I need a harvest of new fruit that will sustain me. Often I need someone to fight for me when I am weary from battle.

I hear the message very clear: God is letting me choose. Obedience brings blessing and disobedience brings cursing. God will actually set His face against me if I continue to stay in disobedience to what He is telling me. I’ve been there. It is a desolate place.

Because I am a Child of God (and that is first and most important), He will not let me keep my life as my own. He paid for it—it is no longer mine. I worship “other gods” when I let anything else be more important in my life than Christ, including resentment, hurt, anger, sin, my plan, my job, people, approval, pride, success, kids. Whatever gets in the way of my relationship with Christ has become a god to me. I have to choose. Ironically… the things I hold onto so tightly don’t even satisfy.

God didn’t hold back from me. How can I hold back from Him?